My Bloody Valentine 3-D

If this movie hadn’t been created in 3-D then it would have gone straight to DVD and to the bargain bin faster than a sequel to Ben Affleck’s Gigli. The movie is everything you would expect: poorly written, poorly acted, ridiculous storyline and incompetent directing. But it’s still a fun romp of a horror movie. And the director definitely squeezed out every type of death that could lend itself to three dimensions. Pickaxe murders, squirting blood, eye popping out, decapitated heads sliding down a shovel towards the audience. This movie also contains the longest full-frontal nude scene that I think I’ve ever seen in a “R” rated film. I’m really not sure how they avoided the NC-17 rating.

With all of that said, this film is worth watching in 3-D. Skip the 2-D version altogether.

Rating: 4 out of 10.